A Humbling Compliment from an Old Friend

As a disclaimer to all that is about to follow: “[B]y the grace of God I am what I am,” and apparently “his grace to me was not without effect.” I Corinthians 15:10.

That being said, I wanted to tell you about the most wonderful and humbling compliment I have ever received. About twenty years ago, I began a friendship with a young man who for a time was as close as a brother to me. He was from the Projects in Newark, NJ. I was a white kid from suburban New Jersey. We shared the love of comic book art and writing stories. He was (and is) a spiritually minded person but I don’t think he would subscribe to any one faith. I moved away to college and as our lives moved in different directions and we lost track of each other.

Then, the wonder of Facebook reunited us this past month! It was fantastic to catch up (and we are still doing just that). He has now published a book of fiction and his wife is a “scream queen” in the ‘B’ movie world (perhaps they call that ‘Direct to Video’ these days). I became a student of theology and a pastor.

Shortly after we reconnected, he relayed this unpleasant story of racial slurs hurled at his wife and child by a stranger. I told him how sorry I was and did my best to encourage him as a friend and (as God has made me) as a pastor. This is what he wrote back to me:

Thank you for those words, Daryl. I want to say this to you because we haven't spoken in a long time. You know I'm not one to go in for religion per-se… but before the world I'd like to say I meet many who use the word Christian and [the name of] many [other] religions for that matter as descriptors of themselves [but] not truly understand the weight that comes with what they claim. Christian translates roughly to Christ-like. Christ taught great lessons of tolerance and understanding. He didn't make blanket judgments and stood against what seemed unjust. In light of this my friend you have always struck me as one of the very few men I know personally who earned the right to call yourself such.

As a follower of Christ and one who wants to see the grace of God change me into the likeness of Christ, this is the highest compliment any one could pay me: that I might be considered by my fellow man worthy of bearing the name of Christ. Not that I am a 'nice guy' or a 'great thinker' but that someone can see Christ in me!

Again, in and of myself, I am not worthy of such a compliment. The faults I see in myself are great and I know there are many faults I do not see. “But by God’s grace, I am what I am,” and apparently “his grace to me was not without effect.” This is what I hope that all Christians would desire to see in themselves and in their congregations: transformation to the likeness of Christ through God's grace.

As we think of the watching world… a world looking at the Church of Christ… what is it that they are expecting to see? Perhaps they are looking for her to fail or for evidence of the hypocrisy they suspect. What do we want them to see? People who advance a certain political and moral cause? An organization that knows how to keep doctrinal standards? I don’t mean to dismiss morality and doctrine or even imply that they are not related to the core of what it means to be a follower of Christ. They are. However, it seems clear from the Christian scriptures that we should pursue justice, mercy and devotion to God before all things (Micah 6:8). Even more simply, Jesus said that the world will know we follow him “if you love one another” (John 13:35).

What is it that we are? And what has made us such? Perhaps these questions will focus our minds on the places in our lives where God’s grace still needs to have some effect.